Sitting on my ass…

Dear Readers,

I made a promise to myself when I started this blog back up that I would post regularly. I was convinced it would keep me writing and I was convinced that would save my sanity and open up professional doors in the future. I may have goofed on that promise.

When you’re unemployed, it seems like time sort of runs into itself to where you don’t really know which week is which or how long its been since you’ve last…anything.

To be honest, I have definitely settled into my life in the unemployed sector. I have grown to appreciate sleeping in and differences between weekends and weekdays have become less distinct.

My internet addiction has become more and more profound. I am on my computer for most of the day (I’m on my computer right now!) and I have traveled to the deepest darkest regions of Youtube where channels look like business profiles and post obscure British reality television shows….

I recently stumbled across this absolutely amazing reality show from the BBC called “Young, Dumb, and Living Off Mum” in which young people who, at this point in their lives should be living independently with jobs, their own houses, and the ability to bathe themselves. Here’s the kick: they don’t. These late teens, early twenties Brits have never worked a day in their lives, can’t be bothered to operate a microwave, and clearly find it difficult to bathe by themselves.

Courtesy of BBC Three
Courtesy of BBC Three

And, let’s be honest. There’s nothing wrong with these people, other than profound laziness. The show producers throw these kids into a house together and film them for about six weeks. Each week, the “young dumbers” are given an allowance to buy food and other necessities (generally booze and cigarettes, because…why not?) and then sent off to a day-long work assignment in which they learn all aspects of work from scrubbing toilettes, running errands, and cleaning up after animals to more creative pursuits like advertising and running a restaurant. In addition, the kids must function in a house without the constant presence and servitude of their parents. Meaning that, shocker of shockers, there is ton of footage of 19-20 year-olds trying and failing miserably to clean, run a washing machine, and feed themselves properly. Of course, this is to be expected as they barely have to flush the toilet for themselves when they’re at home. Each week, their parents convene and watch the week’s footage and vote off the most useless candidate on the show. 

What I find next to incredible is that, somehow, this is supposed to be a freak occurrence. Maybe it is in England, but here, it seems that rampant cluelessness is the norm. While I doubt all freshly minted adults are getting bathed by their mothers and can’t seem to figure out the flushing mechanism on a toilet, people my age (27) and younger seem to be getting more and more self-indulgent.

Perhaps this is because of the precedent set by their parents, who, in most middle class communities, can’t seem to pry themselves from their own Facebook accounts, let alone rear their children to be good, contributing members of society. Having children is no longer a means to propagate the species or bare the consequences of unprotected sex in a heavily religious society, it now seems to be a status symbol. Walk into any Pieology in the greater LA/San Berdoo area and their are families who publicly treat their children like those little dogs people used to carry around in oversized purses. Case in point: over the weekend, I was getting lunch out and happened upon a family with a small girl, barely able to hold a knife and fork, and instead of helping the girl eat her food, the mom was glued to the screen of her phone and the dad couldn’t stop looking about the room like he was trying to spot the Loch Ness Monster riding a Unicorn. Meanwhile, the girl makes more and more of a mess, throws a fit, and *then* the parents respond.

There might not seem like much of a connection between neglect and not being able to flush a toilette, but it sets a precedent. This girl will undoubtedly learn that getting what she wants will mean throwing a snit fit and when she throws a snit fit, her parents will do anything to get her off their backs. This, of course, begets the inability or the disinterest in independence, which begets horrible, horrible people.

Until then, I feel like we should have “Young, Dumb, and Living Off Mum” in the States, though I wonder how in the world the show producers would narrow the selection process…

Meanwhile, I want to see about entering my cat in the show across the pond…I wonder what that will take. Seriously, the animal is driving me crazy…he can barely feed himself and I find myself constantly cleaning up after his bodily functions…

Until later, dear readers.


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